Friday, December 28, 2007


I received my 2008 planner calendar today. I had been using photocopied sheets that I had poked holes in so they would fit the binder in my planner, so it was really nice to get the actual calendar. I keep looking for the symbolism in receiving my calendar, but I guess some things just are what they are.

I got my 5 foot tall jewelry box filled last night! Well, it's not filled, but I have all my jewelry in there now. I didn't know I had so many necklaces. When I get back from Montana, I'll take a picture of it. It's so cool!

We are going to Montana for 5 days. I think I want to have a sledding party. One thing is holding me back: my weight. I aniticipate feeling a lot better this time next year. I will be able to run and climb and fit in movie theater seats a lot better! I WILL do this. I have a week scheduled at Bally's when I get back and then a week after THAT, I have a week scheduled at 24 Hour Fitness. We'll see which one fits me better. I'm going to prepare a pro and con list to help me figure it all out. TJ suggested Curves, but I don't think that's intense enough for me.

There's still a cloud over the holiday season, what with the rift with Chrissy. It's amazing to me how Greg's request for a discussion about how we, as a family, want to handle protocol for being late has turned into the silent treatment. I'm also amazed at how long this could be/is dragging out. Life is too short. Let's figure it out, please, and move on.

Wednesday, December 26, 2007


It's only a day after Christmas and I am readily anticipating the start of a new year! 2008 will hold challenges, I'm sure, but I also believe it will hold incredible blessings. Here are a few of my hopes for the new year:
  • Increased fitness for both Greg and myself.
  • Attend Scarlett's wedding in May.
  • Evaluate my career choices.
  • Celebrate Greg's college graduation.
  • Further develop my beliefs about God, love, and compassion.
  • Pay attention to others and anticipate their needs.
  • Be more relaxed.
  • Continue to become comfortable in my own skin.

Monday, December 24, 2007


The phone call went like this:
Her: I'm calling to let you know I'm getting in later than 6:45 tonight.
Me: Oh! I thought your flight got in at 3:00.
Her: No. It was always going to be 6:45, but now there are delays and we won't get in until 9:00 so I'm just going to go to my mom's. Would you let Kammers know that I won't be there tonight?
Me: Sure! No problem! Boy, we're going to Montana next week so we probably won't see you until after the New Year.
Her: I know - crazy, huh?
Me: Yep.
Her: Well, I love you. Oh, and you probably don't know, but when Greg deposited the child support, was it check or cash?
Me: I don't know. Sorry.
Her: That's ok. Love you. Bye.
Me: Love you too. Bye.

I'll be so glad when Christmas 2007 is behind us.

Monday, December 17, 2007

It's God's world - we just live here.

That was the message of my weekend. I'm not sure how I feel about it. I feel like God is messing with me, even though I know rationally that that's not part of His character. I do feel like my faith is stretched. In other words, learning about giving up trying to control everything to the point of micro managing. This last week, I had lists and schedules for EVERYTHING! Looking back, it was kind of ridiculous.

It's amazing the kind of pain you can feel from being a parent type. No matter what, I love Chrissy with all my heart, even if our Christmas didn't happen. And I know this is a rough time for her too. She is transitioning into adult hood. With freedom comes responsibility and that's hard for everybody.

In my mind, respect is a huge part of love and when you have differing priorities, it's hard to understand where the other one is coming from. Chrissy seems to value money over time and effort and we are vice versa. That's hard. But I know we'll find a happy medium. It's just going to take time. And faith. Faith that God is with us. Faith that He wants us to be at peace. Faith that things will be ok.

Wednesday, December 12, 2007


It's a good day, and here's why:
  • 7 Layer Burritos at T Bell

  • A phone call from my husband where the phrase "I love you" was said no less than 6 times.

  • Claw clips

  • Kleenex

  • Red purses (of course, I can only find a black picture of the one I just bought)

  • Freedom of speech

Now go and enjoy your day!

Monday, December 10, 2007


I've always wondered what kind of illegal dealings someone in my life must have. She always has loads of money, expects others to have loads of money, is a snappy dresser, owns luxury cars and lives in expensive homes. And yet.

And yet, there has never been a clear money trail. How is she able to maintain this lifestyle?

When rocks are overturned and the mud holds the answer, questions are put to rest.

Answers. Finally.

Friday, December 7, 2007


At work, we have decided as a department that rather than giving each other gifts, we would sponsor a family this year. It's amazing what's happened.

There are only 10 of us so initially, we thought we would sponsor one family. Then, we decided we could do like one family of three and a senior citizen. So that's what we signed up for. When we called the family of 3, we found out they were actually a family of 6. But we were up for the challenge. We collected food and funds over the course of about 8 weeks and in the end, we had 25 boxes of food and over $300! Just from our little department! And it's a good thing we had all that food because we were made aware of another person who desperately needs food so we did 5 boxes of food for that person. Wow.

Yesterday, we were finalizing all the preparations because we are delivering to the families on Monday. One of my co-workers said she'd like to get the 2 boys (ages 10 & 12) scooters. Great idea. But she was concerned about getting them helmets. So I did some research and I'm so excited to say that Mike Morris at Legacy Emanuel Hospital has donated 2 new bike helmets so that the boys will be safe as they cruise on their new scooters.

Emanuel Hospital has a special place in my heart. That is where my godson, Aaron, spent the first 2 months of his life. When he was born, he weighed 2.5 pounds. Yes, 2.5. The people at Emanuel were great then and they continue to touch me with their generosity.

In this season of hectic schedules, holiday traffic, and franticly running around to find that perfect gift, it's fulfilling to get back to the basics of putting love in action.

Tuesday, December 4, 2007

GREAT first dance!

Follow this youtube link to see THEE FUNNIEST first dance at a wedding EVAH!


I'm calling this "untitled" because as I think of the last few days' events, I don't know how to sum them up.

Last night, my mom told me that her cousin committed suicide on Sunday. I never met him. My mom wasn't close with him. But ya know, when someone makes the choice to kill themselves, you always ponder the meaning of life, what led someone to do that, what about those left behind, what about my own mortality, etc etc.

Then yet another revelation. Someone I care about deeply told me he's been struggling with addiction issues for about 15 years. First, it was alcohol; then, alcohol and crack. He is in recovery (has been for the last 3 years) and is living with his sponsor so he's in a good place. But it just blew my mind. I knew he had struggled with his sexual identity, but I had no idea about the addictions. Not that I SHOULD have, you know? It's his business. But I was just really overwhelmed about what I was hearing.

After that, I discovered that another loved one, who has my heart and whom I thought I knew really well, has passions and interests that we've never talked about. It made me scared to think that maybe we don't know each other. This person's passions aren't MY passions, but I don't think that's a requirement for love. However, I do worry that there won't be ENOUGH common ground between us to maintain the love we have. Well, the love would be there, but I worry that it would be superficial. Sometimes, I don't know how to have friendships with people whose ideals are different from mine, but I so badly WANT to! Lord, help me have an open mind and heart.

And then there's Christmas. It's usually a really enjoyable time for me, but for some reason this year has been a struggle. I'm alone a lot, which I don't care for, but I feel like I don't have ENOUGH alone time. Doesn't make any sense! I just want to get back to the basics of the reason for the season; Jesus' birth, family, well - that's it, really. I was going to write caroling, celebrations, etc. but really, the TRUE BASICS are Jesus & family. Keeping it simple can seem so easy, but I guess this season, I'm going to have to be very intentional about it.